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Domingo (Bridesmaids Speech)

Saturday Night Live, Andrew Dismukes, Heidi Gardner, Ego Nwodim, Sarah Sherman, Ariana Grande, Marcello Hernández, Chloe Fineman

2024, İngilizce

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Hit it
The bridesmaids wanted a celebration
So we took a trip, bachelorette vacation
'Cause we know she needs one, a break from Matthew
Just kidding, Matt, we're glad she has you
We're out, the shots are flowing, yeah
Guys on the dance floor grooving, yeah
We say, "No thanks, she's taken," yeah
(Sing it)
Now she's with a hot guy, but he looks gay, heard his name is Domingo
Second location, maybe he's bi, still dancing with Domingo
Third location, fully straight, fully touching Domingo
"I can't wait to be his wife," she's pointing to Domingo
So quick question, who's Domingo?
Oh, just this random guy we met, I told you about him
I'm positive you did not
In the bathroom, we take her aside
She says, "Don't worry, we won't cross the line"
"Think of your fiancé," she says, "Good reminder"
Hands me her ring, then we can't find her
You took off your ring? Is this true?
Well, I just didn't want to lose it in the hot tub
What hot tub?
Now we're back in the house, in the hot tub, she's there with Domingo
Ask us to leave, get a hotel, she's vibing with Domingo
You asked them to leave and get a hotel?
Shh! You're missing it
At the Marriott, googling Domingo
Just to make sure he's not psycho
But he's actually a doctor and randomly a model
And he volunteers with weird, sick animals (Ohh!)
Is the point of this song just that Kelsey cheated on me all weekend?
No, the point is, it's Espresso
You're not even listening to the lyrics
That's all I'm listening to
The next day, she said, "Nothing happened"
They talked all night about you, Matthew
Then at brunch, she just starts crying
We ask her, "Why?", she says, "I'm just so tired"
We say, "Take a nap"
She says, "I'm not that kind of tired"
Okay, I need answers now about you and whoever this Domingo guy is
And not for nothing, but the rhyme scheme has gone completely out the window
Okay look, I'm sorry I met someone I connected with, but Domingo is in the past
Kelsey, I'm here
See now, if this is Domingo, I'm gonna be pissed
(Hey Matt!) Came all this way, had to explain, direct from Domingo
Kelsey's a friend, she's like my sis, but we did hook up though
What? Why would you guys tell me this through song?
I hope we can still be friends

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